What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Why is the band Nickelback unliked so much?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

I'm straight, so why do I love watching guys cum?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

What's the most incredible coincidence that ever happened to you?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Can they start feeding only one meal to prisoners on death row or those doing a life sentence? Because only then will it be real punishment. If they want extra food they can work or pay from their own pocket.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

How do you find out who your handler is as a targeted individual?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why do men like BBW? What is the attraction?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

What makes you think that former U.S. President Donald Trump's legal team has already been laying the groundwork for an appeal in the hush money trial?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

What caused the decline of the Soprano crew?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What are some healthy ways to start losing weight without risking starvation mode or extreme food restriction?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

TEXT:

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Has your wife made you a cuckold?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Do you believe that Jesus was God on Earth?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?